November 5, 2009 - 7:44am
I've been on the Zoloft and Invega for over a yr. I was on Risperdal from feb 08 to aug 08. I've been taking the Gabapentin for about a month and half. I'm going to have to wean myself off with the doctors help. I will have to do CBT and ERP. So I develope coping skills. I'm just tired of feeling strange and not myself. I did it before when I gave up and thought something was wrong with me. But it seems as the doctors try to cocktail there way out of me being obsessive it's just making matters worse. So wish me luck, I won't get to see her for like a month but It will happen.
November 5, 2009 - 8:37am
#2
I have OCD but they say I
I have OCD but they say I have Cannibis Psychotic Disorder which I can understand them cos I didn't give them the full picture. Ya if I smoke Cannibis it throws me into A lit'l Psychosis and get my OCD flaring. But also Once I turned 20 that's when the episode hit. I was doing everything etc. And honestly all that could of drew it out to the surface. But IDK. If I go off the Invega I know my Voices will come back but there not commanding voices there just like lit'l wispers. Thay don't tell me to hurt anyone they are pretty much a reflection of what I am thinking. Second if I go off the Zoloft I know I'll be fighting my OCD theme which is Psychotic in it Self. But considering my options I have no other choice, in the long run it's going to help me. When I went thru my episode in 05/ I didn't even take it seriously and I was thinking God was punishing me. So I kept useing the drugs up until about may/06. That's when the Cannibis would throw my into the episodes so I kinda was stupid about that. So I think this is a broader distriction of what I go thru and may help you understand and I'm very in tune with it.
modx
November 5, 2009 - 10:15pm
#3
Yup, went to see the doctor.
Yup, went to see the doctor. I really seemed like I needed the benzo's but I said I'm alright lets work on the CBT/ first and see if I can get some behavioral skills in place, re route the way I think and just give this a try. I think it's in my best interest to do this and also I know this is not the forum to really be talking bout this but IDK, I'm bored. Wish me luck guy's and your in my thoughts.
November 5, 2009 - 10:54pm
#4
Good luck
Good luck Sonic, let us know how it goes. Dont worry about sharing, the Lounge was created exactly for this purpose, off topic chit chat.
November 5, 2009 - 11:31pm
#5
sometimes
i stop takeing my oxycodone for a week at a time just so i know how much pain im really in ,most of the time after 3 days of just takeing motrin 800 for pain im ready for the oxycodone the pain rune's my warcraft playing !
PS.
if god did not want people to use drugs god would not have made em so good for us !!
November 6, 2009 - 8:08am
#6
What I meant to say in my
What I meant to say in my thread was, the therapist said that I should be on the benzo's. And I was like tempted at first then I was like no got to do this. It feels good to do whats right at first and then if I do develope resistance skills then, Yes it is to be consider.
November 6, 2009 - 9:56am
#7
sounds like you are moving in
sounds like you are moving in the right direction...keep it up
November 6, 2009 - 10:32am
#8
Yes!
Keep up the good work
November 6, 2009 - 11:12am
#9
Good Job Kid! Now, are they
Good Job Kid!
Now, are they tapering you from the benzos or had you not started them yet? Stopping them cold turkey can be very dangerous. Also, if your therepist really thinks you need them regardless of knowing your addiction problem, I have another question. Do you have anyone, preferrable 2 people who you can truely trust to only give it to you when you absolutely need it? It would have to be someone who wouldn't be easily fooled by your addiction personality and someone you could call 24hrs a day since you can't be trusted to hold them yourself. Some pharmacies have medication dispensing. It's usually set up through court order for abuse but maybe your MD could set this up at a 24hr pharm with him to be notified of every dose given?? I say this because you are on the right track and IF you need these meds while you are adjusting to CBT and making the transition... Ask him of ways to help you with this if he/she feels the meds are that necessary while you make the crossover.
Again, I'm so proud of you and I hope you keep up the momentum, desire, and positive outlook you are showing now. Remember, you will take two steps forward and one back, it's gonna be hard but you control your life. Surround yourself with the right people and never be afraid to ask for help or guidance.
November 6, 2009 - 11:59am
#10
I've tried to think of idea's
I've tried to think of idea's to your ? about someone who can help me like that. I'll ask my therapist and see if that is possible.
November 6, 2009 - 12:06pm
#11
From what I told him, I was
From what I told him, I was like I have the OCD controled for the most part but sometimes it elevates to a level that causes to much fear and anxiety and it's hard to fight that misfiring in the brain. So I said I go to a friends and get a benzo. I hate doing it cos it's illegal and I get convicted by it. And he said well I would prolly do the same thing and he considered my past and said I know why your concerned about addiction. Currently I'm on NO benzo and doing just fine. I was hoping there was a System out there that could control what amount I got and all that stuff!!!! But as long as I focus and get older and stay on track, and Truly I don't want a addiction. I want to go to College to become a Minister. And they set up Grants and all kinds of things to get me back on my feet so I'm ready for the real world.
November 7, 2009 - 10:37am
#12
You could
Ask him to write for a limited amount. Even just 5 pills at a time. That way you wont have the means to become addicted, and he can carefully monitor your benzo intake.
Ray
November 7, 2009 - 8:24pm
#13
WE Will see how everything
WE Will see how everything goes. Today I was batteling Anxiety. Cos I over analize to much, I guess that's how you spell that word???(: But ya I tried to wean myself off the Gabapentin and got really depressed and I decided to take one for that and anxiety and It help. I know Gabapentin is used off label for that so I guess it really does work. Hopefully everything goes smooth and I'll be able to cope with out any med's that would be great. Take care guy's
November 8, 2009 - 1:46am
#14
str8up had a good point, just
str8up had a good point, just ask the doctor to limit your script to less than what will cover the amount of days until your next visit. Or you could do what I had to do which is go to the doctor every week to get your scripts, then move to every 2 weeks once you know your not gonna run out early, then up it to every 3 weeks and so on until you are at a 30, 60, or 90 day supply whatever is convienant for you and the doctor. This worked for me and got me back on track so I rarely run out of meds early, when you look into the bottle 2 days after your appointment and you can see the bottom you get that whoa I better start keeping track of when Im taking my meds feeling, which is actually a false sense since you just got the meds but still seems to work. I guess this advice would only apply if the only reason you dont want to get benzos to treat your attacks is fear of over indulgence.
November 8, 2009 - 12:28pm
#15
Off to Church I go. Battling
Off to Church I go. Battling once again anxiety but refuse to let it feed off of me. I'll be alright. My goal is no medication, but if I need them then I guess I have no other choice. Thanks Guy's for the Responses and have a blessed day!!!!!!!!
November 8, 2009 - 12:35pm
#16
Ya it is a fear of over
Ya it is a fear of over indulgence and I don't want that. And the more I try to fight it the worse it get's cos it always comes back to the same thought that reminds me of my past, Am I strong enough? Can I be trusted with them and so on. So I'll just keep a positive attitude about it and hope for the best.
November 9, 2009 - 4:57am
#17
Sorry, but I cant remember if
Sorry, but I cant remember if you have tried any other meds than benzodiazepines for your anxiety? Vistaril or BuSpar can help some people, even if it took the edge off thats better than nothing, right? Dont forget that fear of anxiety attacks......can cause anxiety attacks, try not to over anticipate situations.
November 9, 2009 - 7:46am
#18
Ya I've tried both. IDK like
Ya I've tried both. I didn't like the Vistiral side effects and the Buspar didn't really seem to work. Even tho Vistril is takin as needed the buspar is everyday. Most the time I'm good on my Zoloft and Invega but then I get Panick attacks with my OCD and I need something to decline the elevation of fear. Hopfully we will get my actions under control as I will come to my senses and say I can use these as needed the most. Like yesterday I needed them cos the Anxiety was so bad after having a Nightmare that left me all screwed up. But we'll see how therapy goes.
November 9, 2009 - 11:44am
#19
Hey there sonic
Have you ever considered that your goal of "no meds at all" isn't a realistic one. I used to be the same way, and was continually diasappointed when I had to resort to meds. Sometimes we have to realize that our problems do require meds. Don't look at this as a personal failure or lack of self control when you have to take them. I know there is a stigma attached to most medicines of this sort. You have to realize that sometimes our problems are bigger than us and do what's necessary to control them. It takes time, but once you start to feel better, you'll realize how bad it really was. I think in your case, the combination of a minimal amount of meds only taken when absolutely needed plus CBT (cognitave behavioral therapy) and group therapy can really turn your life around.. Hope this helps...Ray
November 9, 2009 - 8:46pm
#20
Yes it help Thank you!!!!
Yes it helped Thank you!!!! and I just want to try it and see how it goes. The therapist is very laid back other then the other one I had who didn't care. Lot's of homework and things of that nature and I'm really hoping it goes well and also thank you.
November 11, 2009 - 8:50am
#21
No problem Sonic
One thing to remember is to not let yourself get overwhelmed. Take it one day at a time. Something that always without fail brought on stress for me was having too much on my plate. Only take on one task at a time. I know that's easier said than done. And the real trick is to realize when it's happening. You have to learn to realize your limits and when things get to be too much you just have to step back. After a while it will just become seond hand. You seem like one of those people that likes to help everyone, but we have to first help ourselves, or we are no good to anyone else...Hope this helps...Ray
I forgot if you're OCD or bi-polar, sorry. You might have a real bad reaction and I'm glad you're seeing a doctor to help you with this. You could slowly titrate with his help, if he agrees that you should stop the meds. When I was prescribed Geodon, it made me feel very disoriented and strange. I used it less than a week then went on Lamictal, Paxil and Elavil. It really made a difference. With psych meds, it's really a crapshoot. I hope you find some peace of mind. Don't give up! ~ Theresa