November 1, 2009 - 1:26pm
Guys, I was doing good up until yesterday, when I felt my OCD creeping up. So I decided to make a phone call. I only got 6 1mg Xanax and I was taking them in periods. Well I'm more angry at my self for doing this. I have Gabapentin which helps with the withdrawals so no real worry. Just wanted to let you Guy's know and keep me in your thoughts.
November 1, 2009 - 2:09pm
#2
Thx, oneir.
Thx, oneir.
November 2, 2009 - 4:48am
#3
I agree with Oneir, use the
I agree with Oneir, use the guilt as motivation not to do it again. Unless you have the phone number memorized, when I said to delete the number from your phone, it really was a good idea. You had such enthusiasm going into this I had hoped you would make it. You STILL can!! Forgive yourself and move on with your life or else this will be a never ending roller coaster. You have my support, as well as others I suppose, as long as you continue to TRY.
November 2, 2009 - 11:44am
#4
Excuses!!!nope!!
I don't have any excuses. I just felt that annoying thought come back and the more I tried to push it away the more it reminded me of it. It got me over the hump with no real cravings for anymore. I was so in tune and still am, with what I was doing. So thanks guy's I really like the site for the support.
November 2, 2009 - 4:19pm
#5
You are welcome bro, just
You are welcome bro, just stay focused and make us proud. As much as I enjoy talking to you, I would rather never hear from you again from lack of necessity, than to see you battle addiction using this board as a crutch for who knows how long. Not that you are not welcome here when you have this demon under full control, but I think you get my point.
November 2, 2009 - 4:37pm
#6
relapse
As long as you learn from your mistake.
November 2, 2009 - 4:57pm
#7
Ya I do and I understand!!
Ya I do and I understand!!
November 2, 2009 - 6:00pm
#8
Just wondering . . .
One of my sisters has fought with/lived with OCD since puberty, she turned 57 on Halloween. She's been hospitalized twice for 60 days each time, once was involuntary. Having said that, I want to let you know that she is a wonderful person that was dealt a lousy hand at birth. She and her husband of 38 years have learned to live with this illness and the family takes it in stride. She has been taking the MAO inhibitor Nardil for about 15 years now with no further hospitalizations required.
Is your OCD that extreme? So many people use the diagnostic acronym OCD these days when they're describing a much less extreme behavior. We used to use the old Freudian term Anal-Retentive, back in the '70s, to convey the same meaning. I'm not that familiar with your posts, Sonic. What I've read, I liked, is about all I can say. It sounds like you're fighting an abuse problem and that Xanax isn't the only "demon" that you're fighting. At least you're up front about your issues with the rest of us here on the board . . . I, for one, really appreciate that honesty. Besides which, if you're being honest with us that means you're being honest with yourself! Good start, please keep it up . . . Q
Almost everyone relapses. Make sure to channel that self directed anger into motivation not to use again. Next time you feel the temptation think of the guilt that you feel now...hopefully that will help you to avoid this again. You gotta keep remembering that a life ridden with drug abuse is seriously lacking the kind of depth of experience you want out of life. Don't sell yourself short by throwing away your one life here...