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I have been with chronic pain for about 8 months now, and as of late i'm noticing that i can't tell if the meds are helping me any more or if my pain went away or anything. I got my chronic head pain after a surgery on my jaw, the pain however is in a seemingly unrelated area, the back of my head. i've had chronic migraines since i was 14 and thought the trauma triggered a worsened form of that condition to an everyday thing. Anyways, i have pain, a lot of it and all the time, and its located in and on my head to make matters worse. As i said, i know i've gotten use to having the pain, and can "bear it" to a greater degree, does this mean i don't need as much pain medicine anymore, i know this is a common problem and don't want to under/overmedicate or have a false sense of 'normalcy'/'security' and reduce the dose to find it problematic. I take 60 mg of Oxycontin 3 times daily and anywhere from 2-8 30 mg IR oxycodone a day. It's the only effective, and i fight the addictive nature of this type. It is very difficult for me right now to stop, obviously, but desperately want to so i can get away from this addictive drug, i am physically dependent, obviously as well, however i catch signs of addictive behavior showing themselves within me and my thinking become skewed when taking these pills. I'm a psychologist and behavioral geneticist (worked with psychopharmacology too) so i am very aware of myself. There are two parts to this post, am i still having pain and/or getting use to this routine and what to do, as well as what should i do about the growing "need" i feel toward taking my doses and taking the ir meds frivolously when pain hits. am i making excuses during the painful times or creating the painful situations (stress etc) bigger than they are to justify taking my meds? i feel like i do this sometimes, other times its definitely real bad. except for the spikes of pain my general life feels pain free and nostalgic of the pre-pain days.

As it should be easy to see from my post i'm confused internally, both mentally and physically. does everyone go through this at the beginning, should i change my medication to get away from oxycodone's highly addictive nature? most others give me headaches and do nothing, but there are 2 or 3 i haven't tried yet, hydromorphone, morphine (tried avinza and lowdose ms contin, not kadian or the other) and methadone.

please help,

P